You have to follow where God is leading you.
Recently I’ve been feeling God leading me on a journey that will range from challenging and uncomfortable to scary and all kinds of things I genuinely want to run from. Because if we’re being honest, no one can have a full tank of faith all the time. We’re not perfect; we’re human, which means we suck at life sometimes. But as I try to transition into this new journey and try to figure out how to grow an audience for my blog and start getting out of my comfort zone on social media (I really don’t like social media at all, it’s just creepy sometimes), I have to be honest about something.
I love all the accounts out there who have the sole purpose of encouraging and uplifting, telling their followers to simply “Rejoice always” (1 Thes. 5:16). But deep down I’ve always struggled with that–not the verse, rather the enthusiasm of the person telling me this. I’ve always questioned what was really going on in their lives to post stuff solely from the vantage point of happy and exciting encouragement without much concrete, nitty-gritty honesty mixed in. It never seemed like there was much vulnerability about how they were really feeling and how they themselves were applying that command (“Rejoice always”) to their own lives.
As I walk on this journey, I’m making a vow: I will not be afraid to be honest about how something is impacting me, because like I said, sometimes my faith tank is running on E and I have to fight to get to the station and refill. It’s not easy to fight. Sometimes I struggle with fear and it takes everything in me to make sure it doesn’t get a foothold in my life. And still other times I am just in awe of how God doesn’t leave me to struggle through all of this alone which inspires much thanksgiving on my part.
My goal with this new venture is to try to capture the honest essence of what it looks like to live a faith-filled, grace-filled life. I want to capture the essence of what it feels like when the Holy Spirit is talking to me. I want to capture what it feels like when inspiration suddenly hits me like a bullet and I have to write something down before I forget it. I want to capture the essence of what it means to confess your struggles and profess faith even when all you want to do is crawl in bed and pull the covers over your head. God has us. He does. And sometimes those words will fall flat for people just as they sometimes fall flat for me. But it’s the truth even when we can’t feel it.
I pray that you will join me on this journey and be fearless with me. Because God made us for so much more than we are usually willing to see or admit or acknowledge. So claim what He has for you. Walk with Him. It won’t be easy by any stretch of the word, but it will be fulfilling and every day will have a purpose.
And expect to see more from me along the lines of:
I’m warning you now I’m awkward, not nearly as eloquent when I talk as when I write, but that’s okay. It’s time to start taking big steps on this journey (God, help me). And I pray that you would join me and support and encourage where and when you can. Thank you so much!